todae went to meet weijin at her house at around 1pm and we went to AMK hub with my parents. to watch movie. me and weijin watch the movie : ENCHANTED while my parents watch KINGDOM. enchanted is a niceee movie! hehes. (: quite funny and its super nice!! i dun mind watching it again.. =p

many things are in my heart that i duno whether i should sae anot. i am so afraid. people leave.. my heart is soo hurt. who will mend it for me? it seems lie i will hab to do it myself. wads not my faultbecame my fault. people dislike me now. cus they think its my fault. i will den take it as my fault. i wanted to explain bud who wil listen? how should i explain? wads done is done and i will jus take up the blame cus they wont listen nor will i explain.. sometimes i wonder. if i never get to noe any of euu.. will my life be way much better den now? i tried soo hard to get all euu 0ut of my life bef0re bud it hurts to0 much and no matter h0w much i try, i still cant do it. i will jus hab to avoid seeing them and meeting them perhaps..

how long am i able to go on with all these? h0w long am i goin to have to put on a smile on my face and pretend everything's fine? how long am i g0in to face all these alone? how long can i keep everything inside me? how long am i goin to hide all these tears? can everything go back to how it used to be? how long am i going to face all these darkness alone? how long do i need to hide all my feelings away? how long do i hab to pretend that i dont noe about the things i noe? how long do i hab to put on a smile, a laugh when i face pe0ple? how long am i goin to hab to pretend that its not hurting when i hurts so much inside?

if euu like someone, no matter wad one will go through everythings just to be with their only one. if there are excuses, it means euu aren't sure. i will go through everything jus to be with my only one. no matter how much i have to go through. all i jus wished for was someone to go through all these with me, someone who is in my heart and im in his.. a relationship can last if one's true even if they dont hab time to meet out. now i am so afraid.. afraid euu will leave bud even if euu do leave i could d0 nothing. if euu like her den go for her.. if euu dun, dun gib her hopes nor care to0 much about her.. will anyone understand how i feel? can all this pain stop? i am trying so hard to get some feelings away bud it just wont go away. i rather not noe. bud i also wished to noe. wad am i thinkin? wad are euu thinkin? stop sayin that u duno.. thats wad i am most afraid of.. my heart is once again bleeding. all i wanted was for euu to be wib me, no matter if its physically or mentally..

can euu please come back? although i dont noe h0w euu lo0k like anymore. when i last saw euu its when i was around 4-5 years old. i didnt noe wad happened. bud noe i really just wish to see euu. i wished to return to the times of kindergarden.. when me and euu are so close. when me and shan ning are sooo close to each other to0s. even we went to the same primary scho0l, we distanced alot. and end up didnt even talked to each other until now..can euu please come bac. i miss my childho0d so much.. jonathan said that we were kindergarden friends bud i dun remember bud we still talked alot abt our childho0d when in P5 and he left t0 other countries.. i miss my childho0d friends. especially euu..

now i kinda believe that there's no happily ever after nor happy endings in the world..